The Sunday Funnies
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Once upon a time Vladimir Vladimirovich™ had a dinner in his dining-room together with Mikhail Sergeevich Gorbachev. The two men faced a saucer with pancakes, a green tin of granular salmon caviar, a block of New Zealand butter in a silvery pack, a bottle of Gzhelka vodka, and two glasses from IKEA.
"A modest party you have with you", mumbled Vladimir Vladimirovich™, putting some caviar on his pancake, "Where is your entourage?"
"What entourage?.. Now I have none...", Mikhail Sergeevich waved his hand in disappointment and filled his glass with vodka.
"Well, to you alone then!", said Vladimir Vladimirovich™, raising his glass. "After all, if not you, I would be still in GDR, saving money for a Lada. Thanks, amigo." The two men drank the health of Mikhail Sergeevich.
"You see, how it all happened", putting some dew-coated butter on his pancake, "I gave you all the opportunity to earn billions, and I myself now have to advertise pizza".
"A historical unfairness", nodded Vladimir Vladimirovich™, chewing his pancake, "This is going to happen to me as well. To everyone, in fact."
"I wonder," asked Mikhail Sergeevich, refilling their glasses with vodka, "Who's next? How can we guess?"
"There's nothing to guess", said Vladimir Vladimirovich™, taking the glass into his Presidential Hand, "Lukashenko is sure to be the next. They've already named a square after him, and I don't even have one yet!"
"You don't say!", exclaimed Mikhail Sergeevich in surprise, "Well, everything flows and changes, and we are getting old, aren't we, comrade?"
"I still have some time left", said Vladimir Vladimirovich™, raising the glass, "Seven hundred fourty-five days more!"
"You mean what?", asked Mikhail Sergeevich, raising, in turn, his glass, "Are you counting the days?"
"It's Kasparov who counts", answered Vladimir Vladimirovich™, "I have no time for it - I'm ruling the country. Cheers, Bro! To perestroika!"
The two men drank again.
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